JEEPERS A JOY, AT LEAST FOR KIDS

AGREAT, GAUDY emporium of family entertainment called Jeepers has just opened its doors in Rockville. My kids have gone there three times and are clamoring for a fourth visit. I don't know whether to feel elated or worried.

I know I'm supposed to be happy about any safe, fun, convenient activity that can help me bribe my kids to behave ("If you're really good, we'll go there Saturday"). And Jeepers certainly can do that: Its rides, games, play area and happy-food menu make it a kid-pleasing synthesis of Chuck E. Cheese, the Discovery Zone and an amusement park.

But I'm worried about what I may find at Jeepers as soon as it becomes wildly popular, which could happen any minute now.

Will I find a jammed parking lot outside? Perhaps.

Frenetic crowds inside? Probably.

Leftover cash in my wallet after a visit? Certainly not.

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Jeepers is a sort of nightmare cash machine: Your kids push your buttons, and money moves straight from your pocket to the nearest cashier.

Going in, you pay $10.99 -- $5.99 on school days -- for a wristband for each child. The band entitles its wearer to unlimited access to the "soft play" area (slides, tunnels, ball pit) and to the amusement park-style rides, including a roller coaster, a scrambler, bumper cars and two kiddie conveyances (jeeps and flying bananas).

As a parent, you can ride free without a wristband or ticket if you're escorting a child on the coaster or scrambler.

The rides, though smaller than full-scale models found at carnivals, move fast enough to make your stomach do the alley-oop. You'll find nothing to rival them in any indoor setting around here.

The scrambler is at one end of the huge space (which used to house a Mazda dealership) and the coaster is at the other end. Between them lies the game area, where in a two-hour visit you can easily blow another 10 bucks per child.

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The games require one to four tokens per play (tokens cost 25 cents apiece) and may be addictive enough to make even nice kids whine for more, more, more tokens. My 8-year-old son took a particular liking to the Cyber Cycle, a tiltable motorbike frame set up in front of a video screen that creates a simulated race through a scenic course. In 15 minutes I dumped about four bucks' worth of tokens into the Cyber Cycle, as my son sat there gleefully tilting and revving and going nowhere. On another visit, I climbed onto a cycle and did the same thing for 10 minutes. And loved it. There's an assortment of other token-gulping contrivances, from simulated car and downhill ski races to old standbys such as basketball, bowling and whack-the-monster. There are no violent-themed games like Mortal Kombat, since Jeepers says it wants to cultivate a "family friendly" image. Though anyone can enjoy the rides and games, they seem best suited to kids between the ages of 2 and 13.

As you know, it's bad form to treat kids to rides and games without also treating them to food and drink. At Jeepers, available fare includes burgers, subs, pizza (from an on-premises Pizza Hut) and other diner-style stuff. For lunch for a family of four, served fast-food style, count on a tab of $15 to $20.

Does the Jeepers experience sound pricey? Nabil El-Hage, president of the company that owns the place, wants you to know that you can save money by buying individual ride tickets instead of the wristband. These cost 60 cents to a dollar apiece, depending on how many you buy. But if you're in a riding mood, they won't last long: Admission to either the coaster or the scrambler is three tickets.

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El-Hage also wants you to know that the Rockville Jeepers is the first of its kind -- in the whole country! -- and that two more will be built in Northern Virginia in 1996.

Probably the thing El-Hage wants to emphasize most strongly is that Jeepers won't get too crowded for people to enjoy it. The parking lot won't be full, he says. The lines for rides and food won't be long. The games won't break down due to chronic overuse.

I would like to believe he can guarantee such things. But I've spent enough time in family fun emporiums to know that a place can actually become unbearably entertaining. This, alas, may be one of them. JEEPERS -- 700 Hungerford Dr. (Route 355), Rockville. Open 10 to 9 Sunday through Thursday and 10 to 10 Fridays and Saturdays. At press time, the parking lot was being resurfaced and a Jeepers manager said work would be finished before the weekend. If the lot gets full, be careful where you park: Nearby private lots have threatened to tow Jeepers customers. All children under 16 must be accompanied by a parent. A blanket fee covering all rides, but not games or food, is $10.99 ($5.99 on school days) with group rates available. Ride tickets can be purchased individually for $1 apiece or 20 tickets for $12. Game tokens cost 25 cents. Jeepers has birthday party packages from $12.95 to $18.95 per guest; for party info call 800/453-3737 (800-4JEEPERS). For general information call 301/340-3308. Next week in this space: Places like Jeepers and Discovery Zone a little too commercial, loud and expensive for you? Check out our list of community centers that offer drop-in play.

CAPTION: Patty Raber-Max and her daughter, Lindsey, 3, go for a ride at Jeepers, a new family entertainment emporium in Rockville.

CAPTION: Alyson Gerstman, 2, meets a friendly costumed character.

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